In this week’s episode of Our America with Lisa Ling, viewers embark on a journey to better understand the circumstances that led many young girls to become teen moms. Fast tracking to adulthood, each mom’s story has a common thread. The reality was bigger than they could have imagined.
With nearly one in three young girls getting pregnant in their teens, it is clear that teen pregnancy is an issue. One that we need to be talking about. It is easy to see how a young girl could be enchanted by the idea of having a child who will love them, especially at a time when so many teens feel alienated from their parents. We understand how love, infatuation and insecurities can lead you to make choices that you are not ready to make. Not only the messages they receive from their peers, but the messages from the media make a huge impact. We live in a society that seduces and pressures young teens from a very early age. We can’t force them to be responsible, but we can educate our kids. It is vital that we have these conversations with young men and women now.
Lisa Ling spoke to several teen moms, including a pair of sisters…one of which who got pregnant at the age of 14. Their mother, who was a teen mom herself, was unable to take care of all of them. The new moms were forced to grow up fast and find a way to make it in the world. As the oldest girls boyfriend struggled to work and make enough money to support them all, it was obvious the reality had set in. As Lisa listened to their story, we heard the reasoning that landed them in their situation. Thier concerns of not taking birth control because they were told it would make them fat. Didn’t they realize that pregnancy makes them fatter? Watching all along as the youngest sister, Jasmine, carries her backpack, diaper bag and child in her car seat into school after hours looking for help to finish high school.
We were then introduced to Sophie, a 16-year-old mom, who had all the support she could ask for. However she made the difficult and selfless choice to enter into an open adoption with her son. “You know it was one slip up and that was it. You never think that is going to happen to you. You under-estimate the possibility of getting pregnant” But all it takes is one hormonal moment to change your life forever. Still part of her son’s life, it was unclear how these new uncharted boundaries would hold up. But she has a tremendous amount of support.
After highlighting teen moms and dads, our attention was turned to outreach programs that focused on ending the cycle of teen pregnancies. While young girls spent a restless weekend with crying baby dolls, boys listened intently to the preacher standing before them. For the boys, the message was clear. Be prepared that sex will equal babies. The hope was to open the conversation. And as Lisa Ling brought us a glimpse of into the lives of these teen parents, we were reminded of how important it is to open up the conversation about sex and the reality of pregnancy and parenthood with kids today. The show was both eye-opening and touched on a much deeper topic….the conversation and society’s views of sex. We need to have these conversations. Because right now, the media and society are having them with our kids. We must be active in this conversation. Who cares how uncomfortable it may be at first. It is better to have the conversation now, than to find you are too late.
Hopefully you caught the show. OWN shared a couple of the deleted scenes and we included them below. If you missed it, the episode reairs Monday morning at 2AM on OWN.
Teen moms and open adoption.
Pregnancy prevention geared towards boys.
Morning Lisa Ling I just finished watching the show on teen moms and I was unable to hear the audio on Jasmine and Bryana. First I would like to introduce myself. I am the grandfather of both of those beautiful teenage girls and my daughter is Gerry. I served proudly and with integrity in the United States Air Force for 24 years. Currently I am working for the Defense Department here in Saudi Arabia. I tried to watch the show, however this country tried to block the entire show, however I was able to see the video with no audio. It breaks my heart to see both of those young girls as well as the other girls who were aired on your show become pregnant and jaded at such a young age.
I too was a teenage dad. I was sent to Vietnam at a very young and impressionable age. I met Gerry’s mom while I was stationed in Thailand and I ended up getting her pregnant and I too became a teen statistic. The difference was I was willing to take responsibility for this precious baby girl born to me in South East Asia. Many people told me, forget her, just let it be, stuff happens. They said, “That’s the price of war.” I could not do that so I persisted, wrote congress, the State Department, and only by the grace of God I brought them both home to America. I tried to be both a good father and husband, however the impact of war on my young mind, the responsibilities both financial and emotional was really tough on me. We stayed together for 10 years and it ended in divorce and my three children were the victims of my youth and bad life choices.
What I would like to share with you as a strong believing Christian that we need to get spiritually refocused. Your show as well as many other secular shows has not elected to tell America how many times God has often tried to impress on man the crucial principle that every effect has a cause. But so many people today have a difficulty grasping this truth, so we continue to see the suffering of young children and the debilitating effects of our transgressions. As I look back on my own life I can trace many of my tragedies and so much of my suffering to my own too human actions and decisions. My choices inevitably led to harmful and painful results. Actions yield consequences. Many people recognize the saying, “You reap what you sow,” but what they do not realize that saying comes from the Bible. Jesus said, “He who sows iniquity will reap sorrow.”
Oprah knows and I am sure that you also know that throughout America that pockets of poverty persist and teen pregnancy is on the rise in spite of billions of tax dollars spent to combat the problem. Both poverty and teenage pregnancy go hand in hand and be traced often to individual bad choices and bad decisions. Students drop out of school just like Omar, cutting short their education and consigning themselves to life times of difficult jobs, low wages, financial hardship and frustrated ambitions. Just like Bryana and Jasmine who became sexually active along with millions of other girls giving birth out of wedlock to children who never see their fathers. My studies have shown me that children abandoned by their fathers like my two granddaughters are far more likely to turn to drugs, alcohol, and tobacco, adopt criminal behavior and become sexually promiscuous in their own turn, bringing more babies and more suffering on themselves and others.
Way to many young mothers often unmarried because the fathers ran from their responsibility and find themselves trapped in low-paying jobs with young mouths to feed and forced to rely on handouts from the government or charities, to survive. The pattern repeats itself in a cycle of poverty spanning generations because of shortsighted personal choices and actions.
I strongly believe if you were bold and be willing to make a stand to do a show how we as a people need to follow God’s instructions, forget political correctness. Show America and the world God’s instruction on a national scale, I believe, we would see immediate and drastic reduction of teen pregnancy, broken families, shattered relationships, and other phenomena that causes us grief. God’s ways are not harsh or onerously restrictive. God’s way is the way of freedom and liberation and this teen pregnancy would be reduced and no longer a prisoner of bad choices.
Please consider this. I think your show makes a statement and a world impact. People watch the depravity of twisted individuals like the Dark Night shooter played out on the world stage. The media in recent decades have force-fed us with these accounts and statistics that were once rare now commonplace. Lisa try to do a different show and watch the reaction of the minds of people especially our youth will experience when they understand how a God of love wants for America to live. Thank you for your time and “God Bless America.”
Regards
John A. Longo
Saddens me that there no other comments, however it does not surprise me that when people hear that the solution is God, not government or people then many turn away from the real Truth to seek other gods. For me Jesus is the way the Truth, and the Life. Love, hugs, and Blessing sent to you and to all of our young teenage mothers. God word says, “That His word sent forth will not ever return void.” I so believe Him. God Bless you Opera and Lisa.
Johnnie L.
Johnnie,
Since we are a fan site and not part of OWN, not every story gets comments. If you take a look at Oprah.com at http://www.oprah.com/own-our-america-lisa-ling/Season-2-Teen-Mom-Nation there are a few people talking about teen pregnancy. Take a look there. It may make you feel a little more hopeful.