With the last few episodes focusing greatly on Shania’s past, it was refreshing to see this episode begin with talks of the future. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that they were all in Vegas. Because let’s be honest…it’s hard not to feel hopeful when you are in VEGAS! Lady luck, casinos full of dreamers, flashing lights and sparkly things are everywhere. However as everyone knows, Vegas also has its share of regrets…just like Shania.
Caesars Palace put an offer on the table and Shania was deciding whether to gamble on herself. Knowing it was a huge offer and opportunity, she had to decide if she was up to the task. I mean..this was Caesars! With former stars such as Cher and Celine booking the seats night after night for the past 8 years, together they brought in over an estimated $600 million in ticket sales. For a voiceless Shania, the pressure was intense. As the Caesars’ executives gave Shania and her team a tour of the Colosseum’s backstage, Shania found herself becoming even more nervous. She stood center stage and was swallowed by the room. I could only imagine that her voice became a bit softer as she was overwhelmed by the venue. Already doubting herself and feeling out of place, Shania knew she had to work on her self confidence because this “was something worth working toward.”
Then we hit the jackpot…OWN followed Shania as she met with an American icon and Vegas legend, Gladys Knight, at the House of Blues. Sitting center stage on a couple of wooden bar stools, Gladys and Shania spoke of faith and confidence. Gladys shared a personal story of when her son passed away and her inability to find the notes. Her advice…”the more you sing, the better you’ll get. Just hang in there, you’re gonna be fine.” Feeling encouraged and hopeful, Shania found a bit of confidence and began to sing. Gladys echoed with her and I literally got chills. What a moment for Shania….and for all of us to see. That day was Shania’s day!
With the tour of Vegas behind her, Shania headed off to Nashville to see her doctor about the condition of her vocal cords. After 3 hours and 5 doctors, Shania reaffirms that it is simply dysphonia. OK not so simple, but it could be worse. Her muscles squeeze her voice. Fear and stress simply prevent her from relaxing. Knowing that she continues to trap her own voice, Shania realized that healing was up to her.
Once home, Shania was broken to tears as she read through Dr. Gordon Livingston’s book about the loss of his son. The pain and agony touched a place for her that allowed her to release her tears….if not for herself, for the loss they both endured. Back in Vegas, Shania decided to meet with Dr. Livingston (I presume…sorry I have been dying to do that since last week) again. This time speaking more freely about loss not defining your life. As Shania struggled with the insecurities of trust, Dr. Livingston reminded her that “you can’t get to the truth by asking the wrong questions.” It wasn’t about why someone did something to you…it was more about what happened to the marriage that brought you both to this point. Shania continued to defend her husband and Dr. Livingston noted that her husband didn’t “fall into bed.”
As I listen to her focus on Mary Ann and the betrayal she felt, I can’t help but think of how lonely she must be feeling. Does this have to do with missing a BFF? Everyone needs one . Even Oprah has Gayle. Feeling like you have one and then suddenly realizing you don’t is incredibly sad. It must be hard to trust after something like that Trust is already an issue in her line of work….I can only imagine.
Unable to get the answers she was looking for from Mary Ann, Shania met with Anita. Now a marriage and family counselor, Anita had once been the best friend who cheated on someone in her own life..or the “traitor” as Shania put it. “My desire to help is much greater than my desire to hide the past,” Anita shared as she opened her wounds for all to see. Anita had been in the exact situation. While sharing her story, you could see Shania tensing up. She was reliving the emotions again! Shania struggled to understand how someone could do this and Anita was giving her answers that pertained to her own situation. In all it appeared Anita’s honestly helped Shania to heal some.
Here’s my opinion to Shania…there is no good reason. People who make this mistake are broken themselves. Both Mutt and Mary Ann knew what they were doing and knew it would hurt you. They may not be rotten people, but they made horrible, selfish choices. It didn’t happen once and suddenly they reassessed and realized what they had done. They were selfish and you were not important in their decisions. Stop looking for answers because in truth it really doesn’t matter. Rehashing it only makes you relive it and carry the pain. They aren’t worth your time or energy. Life is short. Don’t waste a moment on them. They didn’t respect you and truly don’t deserve your attention. Ultimately this led you to Fred and a life without lies. AND it really is true…living life and being happy is the best revenge because no relationship built of dishonesty is ever free of fear. OK…I’m off the box. Just had to say that. Back to the show.
With her and her sister sporting their rock star Vegas glasses, Shania wanted to end the day in song. Trying to keep the Vegas vibe without getting swallowed up by the Caesars’ stage, her band set up on top of the roof. Singing into the night with Vegas as there backdrop, there was a lightness about the group and Shania. Now if only they could fit a few thousand fans up there…that would be an awesome concert to see!
Next week’s teaser…..hold on because Shania is going rock climbing!